England’s Cup of woes brimmeth. Some might call it signs – 60 years since they last won a World Cup. Signs that the wait might end. Or that there might be a 61st year. Or 64. But ever since Harry Kane’s men landed in their Kansas City base in Missouri, they have been slapped by a variety of misfortunes. Some in their earshot like news of a shootout at an unauthorised bar on the other side of town, others slamming them bang in the face – like a thunderstorm last night that gave them jumpscares when an automated warning message went of. It’s earned them hate-follows from Americans amused by the string of bad news following England, in USA’s 250th year of independence. Here’s England’s littany of miseries in the lead up that they hope will end in a World Cup. This is no average English whingeing, but serious impediments. Harry Kane to Hurricane The Athletic reported on Sunday that the England squad were instructed to stay indoors so they wouldn’t get blown away. A ‘severe thunderstorm’ and a tornado warning was issued on Saturday evening. The account utdreport showed a video with heavy apocalyptic rains and lightening from around the area. An automated warning message was also sounded out on their phones, as per AthleticFC. There was the indignity of being told it was just a mild midwest 4 pm drizzle by locals of Tornado Alley. The heat had bothered them earlier. The Argentines got a similar warning from Meterologia – ‘Alerta de emergencia: grave’ about the Destructivos de 80 mph, asking them to take ‘refugio un edificio’. Indoors. The Argentines shifted their impromptu barbecue indoors.Story continues below this ad SHOOTOUT for real A mass shootout distance away from their training base Swope Soccer Village at an unauthorised bar left 9 injured. The team was in Florida at the time, while 79th Street and Troost Avenue where shots were fired was less than 5 miles away though injuries ended up non life-threatening. This was last Saturday. Earthquake A 6.1 magnitude earthquake was reported at their Florida camp at West Palm Beach when they had travelled from Kansas. The epicenter was closer to western coast of Cuba, 150 kms away, though. Tremors on Twitter followed faster. Bad pitches Harry Kane was asked about the quality of the pitch at their first friendly in Tampa. He called it poor. A gust of American taunts for whining flew his way, though he was only answering questions. Torrential downpour in their second friendly at Orlando left him a waterlogged pitch at the outset. It drained fairly efficiently and hour later. Kit gets stolen, kit gets returned Sky Sports reported earlier that a team transport van of England carrying team equipment like playing kits, football boots, balls were stolen en route Kansas City. Even before the team reached. “The FA logistics are huge and it’s a complicated operation to get kits out in advance,” Sky said. The police apprehended two men quickly for “receiving stolen property” and the cops returned the belongings worth 18,000 USD. Electronic devices, mannequins, training cones and signed merchandise were also part of the tranche. The preparation was unaffected at that point.Story continues below this ad Chef can’t carry knives The USA where guns roam easily, does not permit knives in trains. Even if they belong to the Team England chef. Professional chef knives showed up at metal detectors as the chef was stopped from boarding a train from West Palm Beach to Orlando where a friendly against Costa Rica was planned. Omar Meziane, a ‘performance chef’s, formerly with Manchester United and Spice Girls, had to make alternate arrangements. He specialises in Asian and North African Mediterranean flavours. State laws in Florida permit carrying forearms and pocket knives but Brightlines train services have other rules. The matter was resolved amicably. The littany hasn’t stopped though. Their next storm – Croatia.


