In a strange aligning, as per Twitrer handle Merovaeous all of these cricket teams – India, England, Australia, South Africa, Zimbabwe and West Indies are currently camped in UK. But in a prelude to the World Test Championship, Australia captain Pat Cummins was spotted on a Twitter post by famous TV host Jeremy Clarkson, saying, “Hey Australia, look who I’ve stolen.”
Clarkson, former host of Top Gear and The Grand Tour has a sleeper hit reality TV farm show Clarksons Farm on OTT, currently in its 4th season. It is extremely popular among Americans and takes place on a 1,000-acre Oxfordshire farm called Diddly Squat. The show rivalled BBC’s 30-year-old farm show Countryfile (like Indian Aamchi Martínez, Aamchi mansa), and acquired a cult following since 2021. Pat Cummins, in UK for the World Test Championship, might have dropped in to feature in one of the episodes, went the speculation.
The OxfordMail reported, “Despite being regarded as one of the best fast bowlers of all time, having taken almost 300 Test wickets, people in the comments mistook him for Tom Cruise. Mr Clarkson is well known for disliking cricket, but the latest season of Clarkson’s Farm showed him getting willow trees planted which will eventually be used to make cricket bats.”
While Americans were befuddled and intrigued over who he was – Cummins, that is – and the usual ‘introduction to cricket’ jokes followed, the thread set off another predictable bantering exchange – between English and Aussie cricket fans.
The handle, Jason Nevett took the first potshots: “You can tell he is Ozzie cricketer by the sand paper they always carry.” A David Moore handle responded with, “Just as the Poms carry Murray Mints.” That was a reference to jelly beans and Mints that the English bowlers get saddled with for using allegedly to work the ball for reverse swing. Sandpapergate is of course well accounted for the controversy it triggered.
The Nevett handle kept darting at responses with various version of sandpaper ripostes. The handle Kaotic entered the chat and declared, “Cheers mate, Don’t forget to tune into us and South Africa playing for the world test championship in your backyard.” England’s Bazballers never seem to qualify for WTC, though it always gets hosted in UK.
Yet another “will have sandpaper on standby for yas” from Nevett, had Kaotic quipping, “30 grit please…Although it will do you no good as you would be spectating the final as usual.”
His slightly predictable comeback next time to being called ‘cheaters’ was “No count back to this final” with a picture of Australia winning the last WTC mace.
A few Twitter users also commented that the man with Clarkson was Tom Cruise, “looking younger.” Sine not-so-bright Aussies asked Clarkson to keep Cummins on the farm, because he was “woke”.
English fans, dreading an Ashes peppering later in the year, requested Clarkson to push him into the bull ring and other assorted sabotage techniques, all in good humour though. Hopefully.
